The Second Glass

Although it’s been a couple of years since I’ve walked a college campus, the ancient rite of “pre-gaming” is still very much a part of my life. Getting drunk with a few friends before ever leaving the house allows you to save substantial amounts of money on booze. Plus, it often ends up being the best part of your night. But who says you can only get liquored up with whiskey, tequila shooters, and beer? I present four excellent wines that will get you smashed without breaking the bank.

Wine Cube Chardonnay 2005

(South Australia, $16 for 3L)

If you’ve read the The Second Glass blog, you may be aware that boxed wine is slowly but surely gaining credibility with wine snobs across the nation. Hailing from South Australia, where they’ve been widely boxing their wine for years, this lush Chardonnay shows a buttery nose with just a hint of apple sauce and a pleasant butterscotch finish. And the two-tone cube is just adorable! It’s got cool aboriginal designs and a cute little spigot; I just want to hug it and take it to Disneyland. At $4 per 750 ml, it’s a great deal, especially since it’ll keep after opening for up to a month in a cool, dark place. This wine rides more like It’s A Small World than Space Mountain..

Charles Shaw Shiraz 2005

(California, $2-$4)

If you’re reading a wine magazine, which happens to be exactly what you’re doing at the moment, I’m going to go ahead and assume you’ve heard of the affectionately named ”Two-Buck Chuck”. I’m pretty sure that this wine’s meteoric rise in popularity and the release of the movie Sideways together caused about a quarter of the nation’s population to mistakenly believe they knew shit about wine (myself included). For the record, no- Charles Shaw’s jilted ex-wife did not receive his winery in a divorce settlement and decide to sell off all his premium wine at bargain prices. The Chuck is produced by Bronco Wine Company, and the reason it’s so cheap is because there are just too many grapes in California right now. So enjoy it. I’m particularly fond of their Shiraz, with its ripe, black cherry flavor and smooth finish. Throw one or eight bottles in the fridge for an hour, then enjoy. Your wallet will thank you in the morning/late afternoon.

Carlo Rossi Paisano

(California, $8.99 for 4L)

You know Carlo Rossi. You’ve seen it in CVS. Maybe you drank some out of a red Solo cup at a party. And maybe, just maybe, you said to yourself, “You know, this isn’t so bad.” I mean, it’s nine bucks for four liters of the stuff! That’s like, I don’t know, 25 cents a glass. Four liters! Buy a six pack of Fresca and five bucks worth of fruit, and you’ve easily got enough sangria to fuel a party for hours. The Paisano is my favorite jug, mostly because “paisano” means friends. Carlo Rossi is meant to be quaffed with friends. Friends you trust. Friends with no inclination to blackmail you. Because you never know what’ll happen once you make it a Carlo night.

Sutter Home Zinfandel 2005

(California, $4.99)

I want to get something off my chest right away: this is not a good wine. I put this wine on the list for one reason, which is that it’s sold at the 7-11 next to my apartment. I am a lazy man, and most of my actions are dictated by convenience. 7-11 is a convenience store. Wrap your head around that. I know what you’re saying, “Hey, I live in Boston and they don’t sell liquor at 7-11 here!” I know, Blue Laws suck, but you knew what you were getting into when you moved to (or were born in) a puritanical police state. There’s a reason L.A. is great, and it’s because I can walk two hundred feet from my front door at one-thirty in the morning and buy three bottles of high-alcohol Red Zin to keep the action going when our pre-game turns into the actual game and we run out of hooch.